Should Vs. Want

By nature, I’m a by the book type of person.

I tend to do what’s right because it’s the right thing to do -

But, would you believe that approach has gotten me into trouble?

 

Eventually, I learned about the distinction of should vs. want.

At school, I was frequently advised to take a certain class. My friends and teachers saw

potential in me in that area, so it seemed like the right thing to do. Nevermind that I didn’t want to do it. I avoided it for as long as I could. Then the time came to decide – now or never.

 

By this time, I had a better alternative, but everything said I “should” do what was “right.”

Everything except my heart’s desires.

 

I struggled with the decision, on principle. Finally, a leader close to me urged me to listen to my heart. I did, and I learned a lot more than just the alternative subject matter.

 

You can only go through the motions and do what’s right without a clear “why” for so long.

Living by the shoulds and silencing my wants grew tiresome and boring. Who defines “should” anyway? Why is that opinion more important than your idea?

 

What if what you want is what you need?

 

Taking the other class introduced me to a teacher who remains a mentor to me this day. My purpose for taking that class was not limited to when the term ended.

 

If you’re like I am, you sometimes feel like if you enjoy something too much, it’s like chocolate.

It’s so good that it must not be in your best interest, right? Who told you that and what makes him or her right?

 

Don’t get me wrong. There is a place for “should”- responsibilities and so forth. Generally they

are guard rails in place for your health, but if you feel like you have lost a taste for life, why not

break off a piece of that chocolate bar? You know you want to!

 

Sam MillerComment