Why I wrote I'M POSSIBLE JOURNEY: Finding Treasure in the Midst of Grief.
Losing my father, Barry Miller, to COVID-19 in December 2021 changed my life overnight. In an instant, I felt the weight of his absence pressing on me, shifting my role in ways I had never anticipated. The man who had been the go-to person for family, friends, and even me, was gone. Suddenly, I was left wondering if I could fill his shoes, if I was doing enough, if I was enough. These thoughts and experiences ultimately led me to write my book, "I'MPOSSIBLE JOURNEY."
My dad was a pillar of strength, always there with advice, encouragement, and support.
If something needed to be done, Dad did it. He never hesitated, never complained. When he passed, it wasn’t just our family who felt the loss—it was an entire network of people who had come to rely on him. I found myself asking, “What now?” The weight of responsibility sat heavy on my shoulders, especially as someone who has spent his entire life navigating the challenges of cerebral palsy.
One of the biggest challenges of living with a disability is constantly feeling caught in the middle—capable of so much yet always aware of limitations.
Growing up, I pushed myself, wanting to prove that there was nothing I couldn’t do. But there were moments when my body reminded me otherwise. After Dad’s death, I faced an internal battle: how much could I take on? How much should I take on? Could I truly rise to the occasion? It was a question that haunted me daily.
Writing became my way of processing these emotions.
What started as a journal entry on what would have been Dad’s 70th birthday evolved into something more—a book that I hope will provide comfort and hope to others who are grieving. Memories, I realized, are more than just recollections of the past; they are bridges connecting us to those we’ve lost. Through remembering, we keep them alive.
Travel has always been a significant part of my family’s story.
Some of our best moments together happened on the road, and it was during these trips that we learned some of our greatest life lessons. That’s why each chapter of "I'MPOSSIBLE JOURNEY" begins with a family photo from one of our travels. Beyond being nostalgic, these images symbolize the journey of life—one filled with unexpected detours, obstacles, and moments of breathtaking beauty.
As someone with a disability, I had relied on my dad in ways that went beyond emotional support.
Not long before my father passed, a close friend of mine lost his mother suddenly. Our grief mirrored each other’s—an overwhelming sense of loss, confusion, and fear of the future. There were practical aspects of life that he had handled seamlessly, things I had taken for granted until they were gone. His passing left me not only mourning but also scrambling to figure out how to navigate a world without him.
Through my book, I hope to reach those who are also on a grief journey.
The questions I asked my dad throughout our lives together are now the questions I grapple with in his absence. Why do these things happen? Will the pain ever fade? How do we move forward? While I don’t have all the answers, I do believe that our loved ones leave behind treasures—lessons, memories, and wisdom that can sustain us if we choose to embrace them.
At the back of "I'MPOSSIBLE JOURNEY," I’ve included reflection questions as starting points for others to process their grief. Whether your loss is recent or years old, my hope is that you will find comfort in these pages, recognizing that you are not alone. Grief is a journey, but it is also an opportunity to carry forward the best parts of those we have lost.
Writing this book has been one of the most profound journeys of my life.
Each chapter I wrote felt like a conversation with Dad, a way to keep his presence alive in my heart and mind. As I revisited our memories, I found myself laughing at his quirks, cherishing his wisdom, and, at times, crying over how much I miss him. Grief is unpredictable; some days, it feels like a dull ache, while other times, it hits like a tidal wave. But through writing, I found a way to channel my grief into something constructive—a source of hope for others facing similar losses.
The process of writing "I'MPOSSIBLE JOURNEY" was also a journey of self-discovery.
As I put words to my thoughts and experiences, I began to understand myself better—the way I handle adversity, the fears I’ve carried, and the strength I didn’t always recognize in myself. My father’s legacy is not just in the lessons he taught me but in the way I choose to live my life moving forward.
For anyone who has lost a loved one, I want you to know that your grief is valid.
It’s okay to feel lost, to question everything, to struggle with the weight of their absence. But I also want to encourage you to seek out the treasures left behind—the lessons, the memories, the love that still lingers. You are not alone in this journey, and I hope that through my book, you can find solace in knowing that others have walked this path and found light even in the darkest moments.
